We've all been there - the data is inconclusive. The budget has "already been allocated". The CEO's wife has "some thoughts on the colours."

How do you decide what to do next?

Every marketing decision is already an educated guess dressed up in a dashboard. We removed the pretense.

The Marketing Major Arcana - 22 cards. 5 spreads.

Each one an uncomfortable truth about the industry you work in, drawn from the cosmic void and approximately 400 combined years of marketing experience.

Read Your Fate

The Premise

The case for MMM - Mild Marketing Mysticism
Your multi-touch attribution model fires a JavaScript pixel 60% of the time, in a post-cookie world, on a browser that blocks it, and then allocates credit for a purchase decision that started eighteen months ago when someone's colleague mentioned your name at lunch. Full Funnel? Dark Social? Go figure.

Comparatively, our tarot deck is as accurate as data-driven attribution, while being the only model that admits it's guessing.
New Age Analytics
We built 22 cards — one for every force that actually shapes marketing outcomes. You'll find the CMO who arrives and rebrands everything, the algorithm that loved you yesterday, the award that sold nothing, and many more.

Upright, each card describes what good looks like. Reversed, it describes what actually happens. Read your fate. Forward it to the colleague who'll understand.
The Marketing Tarot™

divination for the strategically damned

Choose your spread

Every marketing decision is already an educated guess dressed up in a dashboard. We removed the pretense.

Cards are drawn

Tap a card to read your fate.

How it works

Choose your spread

One card for a quick crisis. Three for a campaign check. Ten for the full existential reckoning.

Each spread is designed for a  decision you're probably avoiding.

Read the cards

Every card is a real strategic archetype.

We made it funny because marketing is frequently absurd.

But every joke has only a bit of a joke in it.

Share your fate

Has the fate been read if there was no shareable link? 

Send it to the colleague who sat through that meeting with you. They'll know exactly why you sent it.

The Serious Part

We made this because we believe marketing deserves better.

The Marketing Tarot is a joke wrapped around a conviction: most marketing is being done wrong, and the people doing it know.

Every upright card describes principles from the research that actually works — mental availability, distinctive assets, the long game, honest measurement. Every reversed card describes what happens when those principles get overruled by quarterly panic, ego, and dashboards that measure the wrong things. But things don't have to be that way.

We're a strategy agency for brands that deserve better than their marketing is getting.

We work with marketing leaders at €10M–€100M European companies who understand that both brand building and performance matter but feel trapped by short-term pressure.

If the cards hit close to home, that's because we've sat in those rooms too. So we know how to help.

Done optimizing your way to mediocrity?

Send us your brief and let's make your brand famous.
If we're not the right fit, we'll tell you.